Superstitions very much part of us

Shareem Amry
New Straits Times
12-19-2004
Superstitions very much part of us
Byline: Shareem Amry
Edition: 2*
Column: Aside

CHOOSING the right gift for someone is never easy, regardless of what the occasion is. But you can expect the task to become even more complicated if that person also happens to be superstitious.

This being Malaysia, where people practise feng shui, have a pantang or taboo for every situation, and where mourners often claim to have predicted a death in the family by dreaming about a white shroud the night before, superstitions are still very much a part of everyday life.
A friend has been attempting to shop for a wedding present for her colleague for the last week, but still hasn't found anything. The problem isn't the bride, but her mother, whose superstitious nature has turned her into a champion at reading hidden messages into everything.

She has banned white flowers from the ceremony, for example, because the colour is associated with death, and the wedding guests are carefully vetting their choice of presents for fear of transgressing some dearly- held superstition.

This friend has already had to forgo an elegant pair of silver photo frames as her gift of choice, after she was warned that it might make the bride's mother think of the silver worn by the departed as they are readied for their burial.

There are many other no-no's: Knives are a big one because they are said to sever the ties between you and the person you bought them for. Shoes are also never to be given, as they symbolise the recipient walking away from you in farewell.

Then there are handkerchiefs, because they recall the hankies that used to be given out at some funerals to weeping mourners. Clocks are another huge pantang, because they supposedly mark down the time you have left.

However, there are clever escape clauses. Some gift-givers will ask for a nominal payment for their present - even if it's just RM1 - because then the item in question is not technically a gift anymore. That, in turn, supposedly renders the danger (of death, a sudden farewell, a relationship breakdown, etc) harmless.

Many of us live by these superstitions even if we've forgotten over time what purpose they're supposed to serve. The last time I attended a funeral, for example, family members handed out mothballs to all the mourners with the instruction that they had to pocket them for the journey to the gravesite, and then throw them away as they exited the cemetery.

The first three people I asked couldn't tell me what the mothballs were supposed to do. It was only later that someone was able to explain that the mothballs were used to distract the graveyard spirits - as you left the cemetery and threw away the little balls, you effectively threw the spirits off your scent, and thus prevented them from following you home.

Does it really work?

Does it really matter?

(Copyright 2004)
Superstitions very much part of usShareem Amry
New Straits Times
12-19-2004
Superstitions very much part of us
Byline: Shareem Amry
Edition: 2*
Column: Aside

CHOOSING the right gift for someone is never easy, regardless of what the occasion is. But you can expect the task to become even more complicated if that person also happens to be superstitious.

This being Malaysia, where people practise feng shui, have a pantang or taboo for every situation, and where mourners often claim to have predicted a death in the family by dreaming about a white shroud the night before, superstitions are still very much a part of everyday life.
A friend has been attempting to shop for a wedding present for her colleague for the last week, but still hasn't found anything. The problem isn't the bride, but her mother, whose superstitious nature has turned her into a champion at reading hidden messages into everything.

She has banned white flowers from the ceremony, for example, because the colour is associated with death, and the wedding guests are carefully vetting their choice of presents for fear of transgressing some dearly- held superstition.

This friend has already had to forgo an elegant pair of silver photo frames as her gift of choice, after she was warned that it might make the bride's mother think of the silver worn by the departed as they are readied for their burial.

There are many other no-no's: Knives are a big one because they are said to sever the ties between you and the person you bought them for. Shoes are also never to be given, as they symbolise the recipient walking away from you in farewell.

Then there are handkerchiefs, because they recall the hankies that used to be given out at some funerals to weeping mourners. Clocks are another huge pantang, because they supposedly mark down the time you have left.

However, there are clever escape clauses. Some gift-givers will ask for a nominal payment for their present - even if it's just RM1 - because then the item in question is not technically a gift anymore. That, in turn, supposedly renders the danger (of death, a sudden farewell, a relationship breakdown, etc) harmless.

Many of us live by these superstitions even if we've forgotten over time what purpose they're supposed to serve. The last time I attended a funeral, for example, family members handed out mothballs to all the mourners with the instruction that they had to pocket them for the journey to the gravesite, and then throw them away as they exited the cemetery.

The first three people I asked couldn't tell me what the mothballs were supposed to do. It was only later that someone was able to explain that the mothballs were used to distract the graveyard spirits - as you left the cemetery and threw away the little balls, you effectively threw the spirits off your scent, and thus prevented them from following you home.

Does it really work?

Does it really matter?

(Copyright 2004)